Adam and Eve – The Ascent of Man

Now why would a psychologist want to write about Adam and Eve?  Well, because it is a story that is known to just about everyone in the Western world.  “Mankind’s fall” and “original sin” are an integral part of Christianity and have been recurring themes for  around two millennia, in religious thought, art and folklore.  Who [...]

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Managing Panic Attacks

It comes on with little or no warning – a tightness in the chest perhaps, a churning feeling in the abdomen…  Within minutes you are gasping for breath, your heart is pounding, you are struggling to breathe, sweating, shaking, dizzy and faint.  Your chest feels like it is about to burst, you are terrified that [...]

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Finding Your True Self

 Over a period of many years, I have seen a substantial number of people who have had dreadful life experiences.  I have met those who, even from very early childhood, have been beaten (sometimes savagely and with objects,) sexually abused, neglected, emotionally abused.  Many have witnessed violence, been forced to fight and have been raised in [...]

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Smacking Baby

This is a follow-up post to Positive Parenting, on this site.
The smacking debate in New Zealand continues to rage.  A few days ago, one of our Sunday newspapers ran an article on the issue.  I spluttered indignantly into my morning coffee as I read a quote from some pro-smacking character to the effect that:
“Children are not little [...]

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Positive Parenting

I am the proud Grandfather of a little girl who is two and a half years old (at the time of writing.)  A couple of months ago, she had a big upsurge in language acquisition.  Word, words, words – a whole new crop every day.  And she only needs to hear a word once, even [...]

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Grief Part 2

A while ago, I watched a psychic show on television.  Psychics have always fascinated me.  I do understand that many, if not most of them are unmitigated frauds, but I do keep an open mind and I figure that if I am going to be sceptical, then I should really be prepared to apply scepticism [...]

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Grief Part 1

Graham was devastated.  His world had fallen apart, his life was shattered.  His beloved son Matt, only 20 years old, had been killed in a car accident.  I saw Graham at home – given the state that he was in, there was no way I wanted him to be driving on the roads.  Matt had been [...]

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This Too Will Pass

 Carla sat in our waiting room, flicking through one of out out of date magazines.  (Every waiting room has them!)  She was a beautiful young woman, barely out of her teens.  I wondered what problems someone so young and lovely and vibrant could have.
When I spoke with her a little later, I discovered that her [...]

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Calmness through mindfulness

Why do this?
Sometimes our thoughts and feelings are very troublesome.  Often, our minds are like a hot, bubbling, churning cauldron, with bad memories and unpleasant feelings boiling up to the surface and remaining in consciousness, causing anxiety, feelings of panic and tainting day to day life with stress confusion and unpleasantness. 
Often enough, I find that [...]

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Managing unhelpful thoughts

Our thoughts can sometimes be unhelpful, even downright harmful.  They can lead us into depression, despair, self-harm, harm of others, even suicide.  Often, unhelpful thoughts can drive us down well worn pathways, over and over again into states where we just feel bad and believe the worst about ourselves. 
 
Examples:  I’m hopeless. I’m useless. I’ve [...]

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